After a very turbulent and transformational summer, I have drawn a line about my life choices making feeling good my main priority. In the past, I would focus a lot on making others happy and putting them in front of myself. However, I’m glad to say that that mindset is the thing of a past.
Truth to be told, I did this more on a subconscious level, not even realising that idealising others would harm me in the long run. It wasn’t their fault as I was in the place where I didn’t pay a lot of attention to my inner self and how things made me feel. I was kind of all over the place with a little time to allocate to my well being.
The last couple of months has been hugely transformational for me not only in the sense of my business but also my relationships. I made feeling good my priority, and in this post, I wanted to share the practice that ensures I stay in this mindset the entire day.
Sure at times, I will come across things and people that trigger me and send me back to the self-sabotage mode. However, I can recognise these patterns easier and change them quickly. In the past, it would take me months to get over situations that hurt my feelings, but now I can recover within days.
Here is how.
Identify what leaks your energy
This is a big one guys and a major game-changer. We all have situations and people in our life that are not good for us, so the first and foremost, it’s essential to identify those energy vampires.
You can do this by paying attention to how things and people make you feel. Did you go on a date and came back home feeling down and exhausted, or do you feel like you can’t stop smiling? If it’s the first, then it’s a no brainer. You have to let go and move on.
Does your current friend make you feel more upset than happy? The truth is the existing relationships are harder to navigate, especially if for quite some time you allowed them to treat you in a way that didn’t agree with your higher truth. In these situations, I like to start putting boundaries in and saying no more often to serve myself better. It’s not selfish it’s necessary.
The real truth is those who love and respect you will do everything for you and those who don’t will complain about you making it about yourself for a change. If that’s the case, then you will be better off without people or situations that make you feel frankly like shit.
I would always choose my own company over hanging out with people that make me feel like shit.
I’m not saying it’s easy to let go but trust me when I say that by putting those boundaries in and choosing to prioritise your feelings will create space for people that are good for you to come in. Before you even know it, you will start meeting new friends and being happier all around.
Making yourself feel good a priority will genuinely change your life, and you will feel more creative and inspired to live your life to the fullest.
Implement a morning routine
Are you a kind of person that grabs their phone first thing when you wake up? Does strolling through Instagram feed sends your anxiety through the roof? Trust me, you are not alone.
The best way to avoid these kinds of feelings as the first-morning experience that essentially sets the tone for the rest of your day is to implement a healthy morning routine.
First thing I do every morning when I wake up is drinking a whole bunch of water and go to the toilet, then I come back to bed, grab my favourite crystal and meditate for 15 minutes. I can recommend Insight Timer if you are not used to meditation. There are thousands of easy to follow guided meditations that will help you overcome your problems.
You can search meditation by the keyword that best explains what are you currently going through and pick a meditation that stands out for you. And relax into it.
I can already hear you say I don’t have time before work. If taking 15 minutes to feel good every day is a challenge for you, then you need to meditate for 30 minutes every day. Think about it. I am feeling good all day vs feeling anxious. Which one do you prefer?
After I meditate, then I grab my journal, and I write for another 15 minutes. I like to free write sometimes aiming to fill three pages with whatever comes to my head. Other times I look to pick a topic and tune into my intuition to work it out. My morning pages helped me overcome all kind of problems from heartbreak to coming up with new business ideas.
Sometimes talking to yourself is necessary to understand what your truth is and journaling is the best method to tap into it.
Workout 3-4 times a week
Working out, in particular, changed things for me drastically. The truth is you are probably not lazier than me. I’m the epitome of a lazy girl, and it took me legit years to get myself to work out this frequently.
The secret here is to get a class pass, and you can use it to discover your favourite classes and gyms in your area before you commit to one. My favourite workout is F45, and I have been going 4-5 times a week for the past three months. I will continue at this pace until Christmas, and then in New Year, I will see what makes me feel good and restrategise.
I met new friends, recovered a sense of community, and my body is getting rock solid. I have never felt better and more confident and coming into the 34th year of my life, these feelings truly make me feel happy.
Spend time in nature
I’m blessed to live next to a big park, and nothing fills my soul more than going for long walks and connecting to nature. Nature is a tremendous source of energy, and it helps to make me feel good whenever I need a little pick me up. I love connecting to it more so on the days that I feel anxious and down and let’s face it, we all have those days whether we like to admit it or not.
Surrounding yourself with trees will help ground you a little more almost instantly, making you feel better. So don’t be afraid to hug a tree the next time you need a big hug, and there is no one there to give you one.
Write a gratitude list
Gratitude list or the list of positive aspects helps put things into perspective.
As humans, we like to focus on things we don’t have or situations that didn’t work out which a lot of the time makes us feel like crap.
To change this mindset, you can take five pages in your notebook and name them by different aspects of your life. For example, you can dedicate one page to your work, family, partner, friends, and whatever else you like.
Begin by listing all the things that you are grateful for and notice how your mood changes for the better.
We have so much to feel blessed for, and sometimes it’s essential to list these on the piece of paper to nudge you back into feeling good.
This method works so well for me, and I have realised that I have so much to be grateful for in my life.
I am feeling blessed!
I sincerely hope you can utilise some of these methods to guide yourself to good feelings.
Leave a comment below if you are struggling with any areas in your life in particular, and I can share more of my stories and methods to help you heal.