Why did I decide to leave London and move to Bali

Hello friends, as I’m writing why did I decided to leave London and move to Bali, I’m sat at my new kitchen table in my newly built villa in Berawa, Canggu sipping coffee while feeling grateful to have a blog that allows me to share my journey.

Canggu is the biggest digital nomad community here in Bali, and I couldn’t feel more blessed to have followed my intuition which led me here. True words! I have released the need to control the entire experience and just went for it. Believe it or not, everything seemingly felt into a place. With this in mind in 2020 I want to focus more on self love, empowerment and feeling good every day and inspire you too to go for things that spark joy in your life whatever they may be.

Bali Life

As soon as I arrived, I met friends, found a new home and created a routine. I kicked the year off with being vegan, reduced alcohol and the last thing to do is increase the weekly exercise activity. I’m looking for a perfect workout studio as we speak. I went on few dates which I appreciated but sadly no special man as off yet. I’m also writing a book and working on a sustainable non discriminant clothing line while trying to navigate my current business and slight disconnect I feel to it.

What makes Bali so special that so many people relocate to the island?

Bali is a site where 2 out of 12 sacred circles on earth cross in the middle of the Island. According to a legend the site is meant to purify the blood of the Earth and this is why some people are drawn to come and live here. The island has the special energetic structure mixed with lush green rice fields, palm forest, idyllic beaches, waterfalls, vast cultural scene, happy and welcoming locals that make Bali undoubtably a place to come and rediscover inner purpose.

Truth to be told I love creating content and moving to Bali was something I felt I needed to do from the first moment I visited the island two years ago. The energy of this place is unparalleled and I never felt more inspired and connected to myself. I feel so grateful for the journey, and I embarked on the choices I made from the very start of 2020.

Realistically I also don’t envision this move to come without challenges as I have already experienced a few from the outset. The work that needs doing is highlighted on a daily so its the support system that can help overcome these deep rooted preconditioned issues. The most important thing for me is that I connect to myself and strengthen the relationship I have with myself and trust more. Self-love and growth both in my business and personal life is a significant theme of 2020 and I’m here for it.

London Life

Sadly I stopped growing in London, I lost the feeling of gratitude that city that made who I am instilled in me. I remember the hard hustle days when I held two jobs and studied for my BA and MSc  just to be able to afford a basic life. I hadn’t much, but I was so grateful, and even though I was angry at London a lot of the times, no other place seemed like an option for me. I loved it, and I craved it with all of its ups and downs.

With all the hustle, I lost a connection to my authentic self. Mainly because I didn’t have time to pay attention to my screaming intuition to not to put the focus where I did. Regardless of the growing pains I experienced from living in London it finally thought me that there is an easy way to live life as long as you are willing to release control, fear and lean into it with faith that everything will work out well.

But how can I release control and surrender to the city like London which can easily eat you alive, it can make you feel so lonely even though there are thousands of people that you know. This city can make you feel like you are never doing enough or being enough. There is always someone bigger and more eager than you. The race is real, and I lived it for 15 years until I became tired. I battled these questions every day and it took away from my purpose. I decided not to give it more energy and stop hustling.

They say tired of London, tired of life, but I’m afraid I have to disagree. I’ve never had more thirst for life than I do now. I’m thirsty for life, men, for money, for fun, good food and good weather.

All of the above was not as exciting in London. After having spent a few weeks on another short-lived dating app relationship, I couldn’t be further away from the thirst for men. Money is always running out in London, and even though I had enough  of it, the relationship I have with money is different in London than in other places. Having lived on three continents, I can safely confirm this statement.

I stopped having fun in London mainly because there is not much spontaneity to life, having to plan shit two weeks in advance has never been my cup of tea. You may have guessed it Netflix needs no planning and it can even predict what you like, it’s loyal AF and I love it. But it made me a question do I want to be a 30 something woman who stays at home watching Netflix. I never related to Miranda in SATC as Samantha was always more of my vibe but as I mentioned being in my 30’s the amount of effort I’m looking to put into certain things such a party and meeting men is way less than in my 20’s. Perhaps I have met and dated many men, but regardless I’m not excited to travel an hour with full makeup to have another highly potential dull and disconnected date.

As right now you are probably picturing me having Netflix as my bestie and what else to add to the mix then “always there for you and reliable” food delivery service. Following that little dude on my phone map, carrying my food from Dalston to Mare street can be very satisfactory, but the novelty wears off when pounds start piling on, and as he becomes the only person you look forward to seeing on your doorstep daily. Not to mention your Monzo showing the money you spent on food in a month. It’s always a shocker how expensive it all can be.

Also adding the rain and grey weather to this mix truly make for a perfect day at home, especially if you are self-employed and there is no responsibility of a boss motivating you with a pay-check to leave your house.

There must be more to life I thought to myself after I run out of good crime shows to watch. I don’t want to have to motivate myself to do fun things and explore one of my favourite cities. But I just couldn’t find any more motivation so I opted for an easy comfort of my home. The lack of space to growth made me uncomfortable and something had to be done.

You probably think I have a great life with all of my monthly travels, gifted clothes and beauty products and you are right. I do I have a great life in London, but why don’t I feel grateful for it? My main goal in life is to live in gratitude and release my connection to ego.

I have recently read that lack of gratitude can result in one losing everything that you hold dear, and I wasn’t prepared for that.

I chose to embark on yet another life-changing across continents trip, mainly as my apartment in London sold and it seemed like a no brainer decision to escape the winter and reevaluate what may seem like my mid life crisis. This apartment represented a comfort zone for so many years and especially as I had rent control which barely went up in the past 15 years. My apartment sale was a clear sign from the universe to give up control and go with the intuition, and intuition screamed Bali.

Outcome so far

My thirst for good things in life is back, and I feel blessed and grateful every day, I don’t even need to write the gratitude list to prompt the feeling of gratitude as I feel thankful for the smallest of things. I also feel so grateful for you reading this post too and see it as a sign as well that life is meant to be comfortable and enjoyable as long as we lean into it and choose to listen to the inner voice of love over fear.

I find it easy to meet people, gaze into strangers eyes and even fully and completely put myself outside of my comfort zone. I speak my mind and voice when something doesn’t feel right. I work hard here as I’m launching two new projects and in all honesty it doesn’t even feel like work. I socialise and go out dancing every Friday and I make time to brunch and hang out with people. I go to events and workshops with excitement in my heart and I’m learning more about myself than I ever did. Its what I needed because complacency is not the way forward.

If you are planning to move to Bali too I will be sharing more about the entire experience from house hunting to places to eat and work so make sure you check back or follow me on Instagram to keep in touch. I share daily on my feed and stories 🙂

Thank you for reading my story. Sending love and light your way.

Tania xxx